I have only recently jumped on the bandwagon of masturbation. I was always happy for others who did it. In fact, I envied them for being so comfortable about it. But when it came to myself I felt dirty, ashamed and guilty. Having never even looked at my own vulva in the mirror before until this year (I’m 25 if you’re wondering) explains a lot about why I had never touched it unless I absolutely had to. Sometimes even thinking about it or feeling horny would be enough to send me in a downward spiral of shame. Why did I feel so negative about my own pleasure? Why was it OK for others to do it but not me?
The answer is because society has taught us to be ashamed. Its taught us that we shouldn’t be engaging in such behaviours unless you have a penis because it’s just not what females or vulva-havers do. Here’s the thing, it damn well is something we should all be doing. My life has changed drastically since I have opened my self up to the wonderful world of masturbation. I have felt things I had never felt before. Experienced a sense of control over my own body that I have never had before. So here are some benefits that I know of from masturbating.
“Loving your vagina, in every way, is not a sin. No more shame, no more secrets.”https://feminisminindia.com/2016/05/07/female-masturbation-quotes/
It makes you feel sexy
Honestly, this is one of my favourite benefits. I have struggled with a low self-image most of my life (I know, I was a mess.) But since masturbating I have seen my body in a new light. I’ve run my hands over her and felt every nook and cranny and fallen in love. I have felt like a goddess on some occasions and a bad bitch on others. It is so empowering to feel sexy and we all deserve to feel it. No one can make you feel sexy, they can only tell you that you are. You need to feel it within you and masturbating can help you with that.
It helps you figure out what you like
Has someone ever ask you what you like in bed and you just sit there like a deer in the headlights? Well, I definitely have, more times than I would like to remember. It can be embarrassing when you don’t know what you like so it gives you powerful feeling when you can confidently say “I like when you do this, this and this.” or “It really makes me crazy when you do this with this.” One of the ways to get to know these things is by doing some self-exploration. Touch yourself there or use a vibrator here and see how your body responds. Then when you get asked you can say with confidence and certainty that this is what you like. It’s so hot when people say what they like with confidence!
It helps relieve stress and helps you sleep
This is super important to me because I stress quite a bit, normally about things I have absolutely zero control over, and I struggle to fall asleep every now and then as does everyone. Now, when I have a million thoughts running through my mind or when I’m tossing and turning to get comfortable I can turn to what I know works. Masturbating. It calms my mind by taking it off what I was stressing about and it relaxes you enough to fall asleep.
Duh? We know how good an orgasm feels and giving yourself one is just as good and sometimes better than someone else giving you one! If you haven’t felt what an orgasms feels like (and that’s totally OK) then trust me on this one, its fantastic.
It helps boost confidence
This can tie in with the first one but it also deserves its own point. I have definitely felt a boost in my confidence since masturbating more regularly. In the dating world, in the bedroom and even in parts of my life that are unrelated to sex completely.
It has been instrumental in my vaginismus & vulvodynia healing
I cannot stress this one enough, since I started masturbating more my vaginismus and vulvodynia has gotten so much easier to handle! Because you are basically desensitising the vulva and vagina with your finger or toy, it’s training the body to not fear touch and to not clench up when something comes close by or tries to penetrate. This has been a BIG benefit for me personally.
Its a middle finger to society
This could actually be my favourite one. Its like a giant middle finger to the society that taught us not to masturbate. It’s basically saying, I am worthy of feeling this good and I am allowed to explore my own body in my own way.
It’s important to note that you don’t need to feel like you have to masturbate. In no way do I want to force the idea that you must do it, its a personal preference and everyone must make their own decisions about their own body.
Well there you have it, folks, there are probably a million more benefits and if you have one that I haven’t mentioned then please feel free to put in the comment section!
If you enjoyed this post, you will definitely like this one: Different Therapies for Vaginismus